Sometimes, life deals you with so much pain.
When I feel pain mainly from that unplanned surgery that trimmed my stomach, I just need to lie down and take a rest. No medicines required nor prescribed. My doctor's advise is to simply take a rest.
When you are a stay-at-home mother to a little toddler, "taking a rest" is quite laughable. I find it ridiculous. But it happens. Just last week or so, I got pain that needed more than a nap time rest. I had to survive the day until hubby gets home to save the day. Here's how I usually deal with such instances.
1. Relax phone restrictions and allow television time.
I limit my son's exposure to electronic gadgets as much as possible. I do allow him to use my phone sometimes especially if I wanted to do chores in peace (or sort of). Relaxing phone restrictions only means longer phone time for the little one. I am comfortable doing this only because of the practices that I apply:
a. no YouTube - I have disabled that appb. no games installed in my phonec. phone is pattern-lockedd. Kids Place - Parental Control app installed (a recent discovery) That Kids Place app has allowed me to limit the apps Mateo can access, and essentially prevent him from messaging random people. He has already done that a number of times. Someone already blocked me because Mateo sent him a voice message saying, "daddy."
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Random pictures taken when he's using the phone
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Generally, I do not turn on the television. Trying to pacify a toddler when I'm getting cranky from pain is one of the few times I turn it on -- tuned in to a show featuring animals or whatever documentary pleases my son. Interestingly, he does not even attempt to finish the show. So that leads me to our next activity.
2. Do low-effort activities, such as drawing or reading.
Ideally, I let Mateo play on his own. He needs my attention, though, as any child does to his or her parents. So for that we draw or read. He likes asking me to draw a lot of random things, including his cousin Pia, that I feel like I now need tutorials on how to draw. If not that, we read. We read his books over and over again.
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We draw things that he likes.
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3. Have food delivered.
Since he's now a toddler, I'm no longer very strict with the food he eats. I still try to avoid sugar and limit his salt intake, though, so it's fortunate that we are in Singapore where food is not seasoned too much. Not much guilt for me when I have food delivered. As long as it's food, Mateo is happy.
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| Food, food, food. Food makes our world go round. |
He knows food. Seeing the panda on the paper bag the first time it arrived in our home made him happy, like he knows it's food. I wondered if he could already read the "food" written on the bag.
4. More cuddle time - and get toddler to sleep longer.
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We love to sleep
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I am fortunate that Mateo naps for THREE hours. That gives me ample time to rest on ordinary days. When in pain, though, I try to make him sleep even longer because I need a lot of rest. That means more cuddle and snuggle time, which he likes a lot.
5. Embrace the mess and chaos; resist the urge to do chores.
This is the most important note to take. Making the perfect home takes a backseat from prioritizing health. "Just one load of laundry," or "a few pieces of dishes," or even "a bottle to wash" will not do. This is difficult to practice in our current home set-up (three families/couples and a lady in a single house). But I
gotta not do what I gotta not do. A clean home does not matter if I could not spend quality time with my family, anyway.
I have wondered before when I was just about to take care of Mateo by myself how I would be able to do it given my restrictions. I asked for advise from mommy friends. I needed tips on how to make things easy. When it was just me and Mateo, though, our own routine just naturally happened. I listened to his needs as much as I listened to my body's needs. Amazingly, it just happened. I think any mother, whether in pain or not, has the ability to deal with a toddler. With God's grace, it simply happens.
