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| At least I had my M.A. in Economics in 2012 :) |
I knew that I would voluntarily leave the program (to "quit" is just too harsh to say) within a year or so. I am not working on my research, I am not in touch with the School, I am no longer reading PhD comics, and I am just too focused on Mateo and getting well. I just did not expect to make the decision this early, and due to a discourse that intrigued my mind. I have enjoyed reading other scholars' take on the alleged trend and anomaly in the Philippines' election results for vice president. Then it hit me to finally end it.
It is with a smile, albeit a bittersweet one, that I end this. It feels like a real breakup. I cried. I certainly did not expect that I would cry over this. I do not know about a "good breakup," but perhaps it would feel like this one. It is simply a goodbye to something good that I know.
At least now I am leaving the program with no more "maybe's." I do not feel like saying that maybe it would be different if I were healthier, if I did not have to undergo that unplanned and unexpected major surgery, if I have recovered faster from that surgery, or if I have worked on my dissertation earlier. There are no regrets. No "maybe's" are holding me back.
I have pursued higher education because I wanted to serve other people better. Of course I could be of service to others without a title or letters after my name. It was simply my preferred path before. Now I must move on to do something else.
Now that PhD and me are over, it feels like something bigger looms ahead. I pray for guidance. Goodbye, PhD. That was a good run. :)
