MATEO JOSE

He is truly God's gift to us, our little bundle of joy who ultimately makes us one happy family. MATEO JOSE.

Having Mateo in our lives is a dream come true, a wish granted, a prayer answered. I think Reymond has been more explicit in his prayers to God to grant us children, but my prayers have been more tame. I was focused on asking Him to free me from my tumor so I could get pregnant and bear child. This journey is a testament that God hears the deepest desires of our hearts -- for having our own child is more important to me than anything else and is the one thing that makes me desperate to seek healing for the tumor.

The doctors I have consulted in the Philippines and even in National University Hospital strongly advised me against getting pregnant. They said it would pose great risk for both me and my baby. For three years, Reymond and I tried to avoid getting pregnant, and were successful until one fateful day in late 2014. God seemed to have said it is now time for us to have our little Mateo Jose. In my heart, it is the perfect time.

Given my medical history, I have expected to experience a difficult pregnancy. I would not have been surprised if I had numerous bouts of urinary tract infection or had been ordered to get bed rest. I expected to deliver by ceasarian section. Those expectations did not actualize.

I have been fortunate to be under the care of Dr Goh Shen Li, who has a very positive mindset and genuinely loves her job (based on the twinkle in her eyes when I go for check ups). She was confident that I could have a normal delivery and did not find a reason for all the advise I got not to get pregnant. In her care, my pregnancy journey has been relatively smooth, and I had a normal delivery.

As a precaution, she referred me to another specialist, Dr Elaine Lim to look into my case. Again, I got a positive feedback that she found no problem of me getting pregnant. She was actually one of the influences that made us pick Mateo as our son's name. As she checked on me, Dr Lim suddenly blurted out, "Matthew!" telling us that she feels our son should be named as such.

My expected due date was 3 August. I gave birth at 37 weeks, on 18 July. It was a bit early, but again the perfect timing.

Feeling and seeing my baby come out from my body makes me want to cry (with tears of joy) until now. It is a surreal feeling. It is a miracle. It is wonderful. It is amazing. It is a definitive moment that made me feel that God is all great, powerful and almighty. There is nothing else that I can compare to that feeling.

The surreal feeling lasted hours after seeing my baby for the first time, hearing him cry, kissing him and carrying him close to me. It sometimes felt like I was in a parallel universe. Probably the tiring effort of going through labor and delivery added to the freaky feeling, but I was on high.

Mateo had to be brought to NICU for observation right after birth because he was grunting. It was anti-climactic to a wonderful afternoon, but God's awesomeness filled my heart that I knew he would be okay. Reymond has also been there for me and Mateo, being a very caring husband and father (he's simply great during pregnancy, labor, delivery, and even all the turmoil after giving birth!), and my anxiety was minimized.

Looking back into my pregnancy journey and seeing God's miracle in Mateo brings joy to my heart. God gives me strength, while Mateo is my motivation to move forward. Having Mateo is truly a wonderful blessing, and words are not enough to describe his impact in my life.

Excited but overwhelmed: Preparing for baby's arrival

This is an exciting time in my life. I have never expected to get pregnant, and living it feels exhilarating and sometimes surreal. I love it when I feel my baby move, especially when I see my belly move, too! It is overwhelmingly good, though at times it is simply too overwhelming.

There are a lot of information easily available for soon to be mothers. Various websites and blogs are just a click away. Pregnancy and baby apps for smartphones are abundant. Books are and have always been available. Wisdom from mothers are aplenty. Sure, all of these would give new mommies valuable insights on pregnancy and preparing for the baby. Yet, sometimes they are just too much.

Last Saturday, we went to our first shopping experience at a baby fair in Expo. I wanted to take a glimpse of what products are out there and how much they cost, and buy a piece if it is really value for money. But there were just too many products and services offered!

While I had that vague idea of what I wanted from the fair, I did not have a clear picture of what we really need, when we need it, and the price range in the market. Therefore, I ended up buying a sling baby carrier and four cloth diapers with freebies that are very expensive even at a discount. I like the carrier, though, even if similar products cost almost half of what I paid. It has a better design, I think, and I hope it proves to be a good buy.

That shopping experience made me realize how little I know about shopping and more importantly about taking care of a baby. I find babies very fragile. I am afraid to carry them or give them a bath. I don't even know how to change diapers! I have to learn a lot in little time. They say I would easily learn what to do when baby arrives. Still, I want to proactively do something.

I have been taking note of the preparations I would need and things I need to learn, but I still felt out of my element even with advices and support from family and friends. Then I found a cute Baby Notes notebook at kikki.K that allows mommies to prepare get organized in a fun way. If it wasn't in grey and yellow colours that I find too soft, I would have already bought it even at its steep price. Hence, I take that baby notes to be my DIY project until next week. I hope that will help paint a clearer picture of the essentials that I need to do and know.

This is really going to be an exciting adventure, and one that I am looking forward to take. I still feel anxious sometimes, but that is nothing compared to the happiness this pregnancy brings me. I am truly blessed and grateful for this, and I intend to savour every moment of it.

Embracing surprises and blessings

Over four months ago, I committed to finally do my dissertation. I was excited about it. I had a routine, schedule and a number of articles to read. Then after a few weeks and a decent amount of progress, I got lazy and felt tired. Time to make an excuse – it was pregnancy hormones kicking in. My world got even more exciting!

It was crazy timing. Seriously committing to do that research felt good and right, and I finally had a better direction in terms of my career. Then I learned that I was pregnant. It was a sudden shift of priorities.

This plot twist to my life has made my pregnancy more special. I still want that "Ph.D." but my baby is certainly more precious to me, and they are not even near each other in terms of importance. I knew I would not be able to do proper research even before I was advised by my doctor not to think about it for now. I would gladly give up that three-letter dream just to be a mommy, anyway. Simply writing about it makes me smile. :)

My getting pregnant is simply amazing. My doctors in the Philippines advised me against pregnancy, so we tried to avoid it. Yet, here I am now 23 weeks pregnant and expecting a baby boy come 3rd August. He is truly a blessing from God, a precious gift I did not expect.

Aside from first trimester laziness, my pregnancy has been a smooth journey. I did not have crazy food cravings, scary incidents, or special restrictions to my diet and activities. There are discomforts, but so far I could handle them. My doctor here has been very positive about my condition. My baby is growing well. My husband is very supportive and caring. I am one happy mommy-to-be. When He gives, He truly gives.

Embracing God's love brings us joy we do not expect. I thought last year's chat with a friend was His reminder for me to take charge of my life. It felt like great timing. However, God has greater plans. I ought to be a mommy now. I think this is a perfect time – I am calm and at peace with my health (and I'm turning 31 soon). God's timing is perfect. His greatness indeed knows no limits! I really should face my life with a faithful heart. I guess that is a better reminder for all of us.