Something for Me

I have recently created my third Instagram account. I think it's too much. But... my original, personal IG account has now been mostly about Mateo. He has dominated my life and my social media accounts. I want something that will be all about me or the the photos I take. So the new account is something I said will be a momentary (and illusional) respite from motherhood.

I tried to take a nice photo. This is the best I could do. More practice needed.

Last Saturday, we went to East Coast Park to have some fun. Of course it was about Mateo. Again. Our family day (with Ninang Yeye) has been always about Mateo. I was busy looking after the little one and trying, really trying, to get a good picture of that active boy.

Then I remembered about my desire to appreciate more the beauty of the places I visit, or food that we eat, or whatever it is that somehow is a part of my life. So I paused for a bit. I tried to see the life in the playground. It was refreshing!

The moon was beautiful against this big tree. I could not capture it in this photo. But I enjoyed that moment, especially with Mateo having lots of fun with Reymond.

It seems I have forgotten about stopping to appreciate the world I am living. I saw other parents so immersed in their kids' lives, especially those with younger ones. I saw pieces of me in their desire to capture their moments, make their children do their best, and simply create memories. I tried to take photos of the liveliness. "Try" is the word.

At dinnertime, I briefly remembered to take a photo again. I instantly took a couple of shots of the prata that Mateo was eating. I had to do it quick. Mateo knew I wanted to take a picture, and he wanted to play mess with me by eating his food real fast or grabbing my phone.

My little Mateo loves food and eats a lot. We almost always barely have time to take a photo of the food before eating it.

Before going home, I once again stopped in my tracks to take pleasure in what's around me. In the midst chatters and activities, I enjoyed some sense of peace and solitude. I was happy that I could still do that. I can still find serenity in the world's frantic runs. Perhaps peace really comes from the heart.

The place was busy. I embraced the moment, and still found solitude and satisfaction amidst the chatters. That's Ninang Yeye, btw.

I have made a new IG account as a simple exercise to bring back my interests before I had Mateo. Yet, the first four posts so far are laden with stories that involve him. Ah, motherhood. It really changes a person. All for good, though. All for the best.